A Mass of Awesome

Today I am going to talk a number of spoilers for a number of movies. If you don't want to know nitty-gritty details about "The Blair Witch Project", "The Mangler", "The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)", "Paranormal Activity", "The St. Francisville Experiment", "Dead & Buried", "The Devil's Rejects" "Hatchet", "The Amityville Horror (2005)", "Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon" or "Silent Night, Deadly Night", then you had better stop reading and join me again next week for the final Horror on Hump Day of 2010. You're safe until the end of this paragraph while I outline what I want to cover about these movies. I make it no secret that I like a number of things and movies that others do not care for or outright deride. I thought in keeping with the upbeat trend I've been on that I would tell you about some of these today. I'm sorry for excluding some people from the fun, but now and then it's fun to talk about these spoilers.

Let's start with my favourite little story about "The Blair Witch Project" in the theatre. I went with a friend. Afterward we both agreed the following happened. As the film progressed we got colder and colder. The instant the credits rolled the cold was gone. There was no way it was anything other than psychological. I'm in a very tiny minority as a huge fan of "The Mangler". I just love it to bits, except for the incessant screaming of the girl at the end. Speaking of screaming, the first time I saw "The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)" was on a really bad VHS. It was a poor experience when a large bit of the movie was a pair of white shorts running through pitch darkness--with nothing else visible--screaming, to the sound of a chain saw. I still think there is a bit too much screaming, though I'm sure there are some people who scream incessantly until they can scream no longer.

I thought "Paranormal Activity" was pretty good despite that it was in some ways a pretty tame haunting. It's all a matter of pacing, and successfully directing the kind of expectation the audience should have. The guy hurtling toward the camera made me jump, and I even like the demon-face morph. "The St. Francisville Experiment" gets a bad rep as a Blair Witch rip-off sight unseen, when really it's like an investigation of "Ghost Hunters" or "Sightings" in movie format--yes the ending's a bit Blair Witch. The ghost throwing the chair was really cool and the weird doll scene was a great bit of suspense. One of the freak-nastiest things I've seen is the burned man hanging upside down in the car in "Dead & Buried". There are a lot shots of him in the extras on the DVD box I have too. I call him Ham-head to mitigate some of the ick-factor, but really it makes it worse.

Stay with me, I'm going extra long today. Now for those moments where I hoped the movie would do something and did. That was awesome in "The Devil's Rejects" when he made her wear her boyfriend's face and then she chases after the maid and turns into a massive road smear. Or how about in "Hatchet" when he sticks the shovel in the ground and then uses it to spear his next victim? The best part of "The Amityville Horror (2005)" was when the ghost girl made the babysitter stick her finger in the bullet wound in her forehead. Then there is the movie where you wonder will it get to the horror goods and then--BAM--"Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon" turns from documentary making into horror movie when the real survivor girl is revealed. Finally, since it's the season, I must talk about the "Carrie" of slasher films, "Silent Night, Deadly Night" and the world's creepiest grandfather. I love that movie, and dislike none of it. The creepy Christmas carols and songs rock too. That's it. See you next week.

Mood: rebellious.
Music: Callin' The Shots by Quiet Riot and Where Eagles Dare by Iron Maiden.

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13 Nights of Hallowe'en 2009: Night #4 The Blair Witch Project

It is hard to image that someone has not seen this movie, but there are always people. I certainly have not seen everything, and the closer you get to newly released the less likely I've seen a particular movie yet. However, some things you expect everyone has seen. Tonight's movie is The Blair Witch Project and it is certainly one film I think every horror fan should see. This is not to say everyone will like it as much as I do. Some people literally can't sit and watch the shaky-camera movies. So that is one initial problem. Others will not be fond of the slow pace that builds up over time. There also might be the small issue that so much has been said about the movie that all the best parts have been spoiled. Don't let these things stop you from experiencing this film.

Right now I want to tell you a little story about my experience watching The Blair Witch Project for the first time in the theatre. I went to an afternoon matinee with a friend a couple weeks after the movie had opened. The hype was still high, but the complaints of the shaking were about too. As the film progressed the temperature in the theatre dropped little by little. It was quite chilly, someone had to have the air conditioning up too high--it was August after all. The film came to the now famous, or perhaps infamous, ending and the credits rolled. As soon as the end credits started the temperature immediately returned to normal. That of course means that it was not cold in the theatre, but instead the movie had a great impact on both us since my friend agreed on the instantaneous return of warmth.

Mood: mellow.

Music: My Girlfriend's Girlfriend by Type O Negative off of October Rust.

13 Nights of Hallowe'en: Night #10 The St. Francisville Experiment

The selection of these thirteen movies has been
intentional and deliberate. This is not because they are all out there choices, or outré, or favourites, or even due to being special. They are films worth recommendation, and maybe to a degree a few of them are here because they get a bad rep. “The St. Francisville Experiment” requires some defending. It was saddled right away as a rip-off of “The Blair Witch Project” because of the ill-conceived title. “The St. Francisville Experiment” is about paranormal investigators like on “Ghost Hunters” or “Most Haunted”, which pay their dues back to “Sightings” in the early, early 90s. Even “Sightings” could owe back to “Poltergeist” with its engaging paranormal researchers for example. This is a movie about such researchers.

“The St. Francisville Experiment” is a non-comedic mockumentary, plain and simple. The documentary is an exploration of an infamously haunted mansion in St. Francisville, Louisiana. St. Francisville is, in all actuality, home of The Myrtles Plantation, one of America’s most haunted homes. Google it and see. There is some MST3K-worthy atrociously bad dialogue in this movie, but given some online conversations not necessarily unrealistically bad. The pace is a little slow for a movie, but it seems good for a documentary. Similar can be said about the minimal special effects and the plot. After all is said and done, when “The St. Francisville Experiment” gets rolling it is a pretty good horror pseudo-documentary. A little review reading even digs up people creeped out by it.

Mood: impressionable.
Music: Halloween by Aqua off of Aquarius.